Move Your Mind From Dreams Behind

February 3rd, 2012 by cgerber

I can’t sleep. Every time I try to sleep I just hear my heart pounding in my head then get anxious about the future. The unknown of what’s to come. I’m not talking end of the world stuff lol, I’m just talking personal goals, dreams, fears ect. The reflecting on the time I’ve been alive and what little I’ve seemed to get done compared to what I wanted to. I have this problem where I fight my way into the future to accomplish my dreams and goals, but by the time I accomplish them I’ve already come up with more, so I don’t take any time to sit back and enjoy what I did. It’s never good enough ya know? At least that’s how it seems. I can always do better, so I must. This is one of the countless reasons I can’t sleep at night.

Reason #978: Brain won’t shut off as it tries to work through ways to change the world while in bed. Stupid brain.

In the midst of my obsessing and working, I’ve once again managed to completely lose track of time. Days feel like months and months feel like days as I drift around in a mental storm of ideas and frustrations. For every accomplishment I get mad at 10 failures. The best remedy for all this is a good round of Halo with my buddy, but I highly doubt he’s awake at 3AM. Oh well, there’s something peaceful about sitting here in the living room in total darkness on my laptop. I think it’s helping calm my brain.

Brains are so powerful. It never ceases to amaze me how powerful the human mind is. It has the power to create complete alternate realities in a person’s mind, and the ability to change the world in the eyes of a painter. When I was a kid I practices for a year to try and move things with my brain lol. Seriously. I would concentrate for periods throughout the day and try to move pens and stuff. One day, after practicing for a while, I had 3 of my friends watch a penny as I tried to move it. I closed my eyes, focused all my concentration on the penny, and then after a few minutes heard screaming as my friends jumped up and down and ran across the room lol. Apparently I did move it and it freaked them out. I asked the a hundred times if they were serious and they were. The kicker though is that it took a year of painful concentration to move a penny 2 centimeters, when I could just push the stupid thing with my finger. In other words, I gave up on that lol. Made no sense when I saw how much effort went into that and how little I got in return. I still try it every now and then, but unless I can push a TV over or something, who cares.

By the way, if that all sounds impossible or insane, you really can look up studies on mental telekinesis. It’s not science fiction.

I’m going to sit and daydream here in the dark for a while.

Chad Gerber

The Battles of GI Joes And Superheroes

February 1st, 2012 by cgerber

When I was a kid my favorite thing to play with were action figures. I had a total of around 8 I had collected over the years, and they consisted of GI Joes, a handful of Marvel superheroes, and Batman. I’m finding now that I’m having trouble topping the incredible adventures I had with that crew. We invaded evil fortresses, fought my sister’s amazon Barbies, and survived space. How can I top that? I even sent The Incredible Hulk down a 300 Foot zipline into the neighbors yard only to have it break half way, dropping him miles down to earth. I remember one battle where everyone was held up in a dried mud fort I had built the day before the battle. Enemy tanks began attacking the fort until it finally gave way and the battle flooded out onto the sandbox battle field. What have I done since then? I haven’t battled a single enemy or saved anyone.

I could never figure out what to do with Silver Surfer so he stayed put most the time.

I remember one battle in the snow against one of Batman’s enemies Captain America refused to stand up in the snow so I threw him against the deck railing and his leg broke off. That was a very sad day for all of us. After that Captain America couldn’t bend his knee anymore cause I used elmers glue to put his lower leg back on. Still he fought just as hard and still made up for the Silver Surfers absence (I had no idea what Silver Surfers powers were).

About once a week some of the crew would meet up with John’s X-men and battle in his yard and basement again all types of evil enemies. One of them being the fish pond out back. We had a few too many close calls on that water fall going into the murky pond. I know at one point we were able to force an enemy close enough that he actually fell in. He wasn’t retrieved till the following spring.

Another time we wanted to test the blasting strength of an M80 so we wrapped a GI Joe villain around it. Those things could survive ANYTHING.

Every Christmas the battle went into the Christmas tree, and Halloween most of the crew found themselves battling in a strange gooey room.. AKA a pumpkin.

Sometimes we would lose crew members to a glass of water and the freezer only the rescue them a day later. It always amazed me at how quickly Spiderman could recover from such a horrific event.

Nowadays I try to duplicate those battles using video games but it’s just not the same. No video allows Spiderman and Batman to fight side by side…. and what video game unites GI Joes with superheroes in a cardboard corndog box spaceship? None.

We fought long and hard…

Chad Gerber

Where’s The Windex Beef?

February 1st, 2012 by cgerber

As most of you know I’ve taken it upon myself over the past few years to try and get educated on foods and health type stuff because I didn’t feel well in general. I guess this started in like 2007. I had always sort of gone to the gym, but I never knew what I was doing in there, and foodwise I had no clue what I was eating. I started with eliminating drinking soda. Not that soda is evil or anything, I just heard that athletes never drank soda during the season because it sucks so much energy out of your body. After a month of no soda I found that to be 100% true. I haven’t had soda since 2007 lol. I do miss it, but I enjoy having the energy more than a few minutes with a tasty snack. So anyway, in my quest to learn what I’m eating and stuff I come across new information that helps me avoid death foods, or foods that make me feel good. Most our meat here in America is soaked in ammonia. Check out this vid on our food. Don’t embrace the whole “ignorance is bliss” mentality, because you won’t be thinking that when you’re sick with IVs dripping in your body.
This video is tame. Start finding out who made your food. Try to get organic or if you know a local rancher/farmer go talk to them and buy directly from them. It’s better for our economy AND your health. Our food is disgusting, and it’s made this way for the love of the almighty dollar. These corporations owe you nothing, so start using your brain and avoid their poison. Not ALL corporations are the devil or anything, but any company that thinks it’s ok to feed their customers chemicals isn’t not using a moral compass.
Once again, documentaries you should watch if you’re trying to educate yourself on what’s going on:

Food Inc.
Forks Over Knives
Fat Sick and Nearly Dead

Nobody is going to cure cancer any time soon, so educate yourself on just what these weird aliments are exactly, and if anyone has had success in avoiding them. Those documentaries will get you started. :)
By the way, I have no agenda, I don’t work for any companies lol, I just believe that acting like a sheep and following wolves around is stupid.

Chad Gerber

I Have It Good And The World Is Behind

January 31st, 2012 by cgerber

Well hello there you. It’s a late night of doing band work, listening to some incredible interviews online, and texting with 2012 about stuff. I ate a bag full of delicious berries and am going to go eat some brownies.

Today I ran out of toilet paper and had to use Kleenex. Not that bad really… not that bad at all.

I don’t feel like talking about current events, I don’t feel like talking about anything serious at all. I just want to go play broom hockey at the skating rink with friends… despite knowing that’s obviously not possible at 1AM…….necessarily.

I’ve been frustrated lately. I’m at that point again in my life where the good stuff I have in my life has become the norm and I’m discontent once again. Sure I have a billion amazing things in my life, but after a while I forget and want change, or better things. It’s the human condition. I’m not talking about achieving goals or making a difference in the world, I’m talking about creature comforts. Things humans deem important. I have an amazing life, I really do, and I get frustrated when I constantly lose sight of that. I have incredible friends, incredible family, and even a loyal dog, but lately I’ve just been ignoring all that and thinking about what I need to get done in life, what goals I need to accomplish, and how I’m annoyed at where I am.. blah blah blah. I think there’s a healthy version of that, then an immature version.. I’m doing the immature one lol. So basically I’m frustrated that I’m frustrated. I mean… as humans our greatest weakness (in my opinion) is our horrible memories. We forget the wrongs we do to ourselves and others, then do them again and again. We say mean things because we forgot out much it hurt that last person we said something mean to years ago ect…….. WHAT ON EARTH AM I TALKING ABOUT!? I’m just feeling squeezed when I need to step back and enjoy things. Stress increases cancer risk you know, and dealing with stress in general keeps health problems away. That is a proven fact. So I need to enjoy all the incredible things in my life right now instead of forcefully pushing ahead even if I shouldn’t be…..

None of this is probably making sense, I’m sorry. It’s hard to understand in my brain let alone tell thousands of readers… I probably sound insane.

Back to being lighthearted.. I’ve been doing some online gaming with my buddy John who is literally my very first friend. It amazes me how I have known John since I was able to walk outside and meet him through my parents fence. His presence in my life in some ways is more significant than some of my family. So it’s funny to me how we can play online video games with these dorky headsets, and laugh for hours exactly how we did growing up together…. which means when I’m 80 years old we’ll be doing the exact same thing. The laughing part anyway.. or unless one of us is dead.

Speaking of death (sorry the lighthearted is gone again lol) I just found out a family friend of mine has been told he’s going to die in a year by doctors. Cancer of course. I’ve known people who were condemned by doctors before and they decided to prove them wrong, and they did. I just hope he chooses that instead of believing his death sentence. Knowledge is available to almost the entire world right now, and the answers for most common problems are right before us, but we sift through the trillions of bits of information. That’s crazy to think. An ancient book called Revelations spoke of in the future knowledge being available to everyone and in abundance.. it’s still weird to me to think that is really is. I can find information on how to do anything within seconds. Another thing ancient history tells us, is that every time mankind gets close to its apex, we fall into mass chaos.

Or what about this!? Do you realize that everything we base our existence around is electromagnetism? electricity! That means that mankind discovered this natural/unnatural energy and is building everything upon it. All of our world runs on it, which means we build everything to consume it, which also means that all medical equipment that is invented starts with the property of electricity! Well what if we stopped building so much on electricity and focused more on using other types of energies and or elements to round off our inventions and directions? What if our hyper focus on building worlds around electricity is keeping us from using something else that has the power to zap cancer and disease within seconds? What if there’s something sitting right under our noses, that when harnessed with medical equipment could reverse Alzheimers, yet we’re too focused on building using the primitive materiel of electricity to do so! Early man relied on horses, later we rely on cars, so what is the next step that we’re not at yet? Hyper focus isn’t always a good thing. Being well rounded I think is…

and that is all. Just solved the worlds problems in a stupid blog lol

Chad Gerber

Your Brain is Being Mined

January 29th, 2012 by cgerber

I just returned from the high desert today where I was camel riding and hunting sand creatures. I managed to clip one but was unable to retrieve it for dinner and almost starved.

Privacy, all forms is and will be our most valuable asset as human beings. Our information is now to be mined by giant companies who want to profile our living habits in order to create products and campaigns that keep us in this matrix of sheep and consumerism. If you don’t have a clue what I’m talking about, regardless of how extreme it may sound, you are already too lost. You are valuable to them and they want your information to control you in one way or another. Mostly harmless, but many will and do lose their lives as a direct result of their ignorance. How do I know this? I’ve spent my entire life searching for a way behind “the curtain” and I found it. Countless hours of research and trial and area, along with schooling and on hand experience, I found we are indeed ants in an ant farm and 99% have on idea what we are being farmed for. I don’t expect you to believe me, but I hope you’ll begin the research to see where you are headed in all of this. People don’t rule over people without more knowledge than the other. Think me crazy all you want, but If you begin your own search to find out what’s behind this certain of politics and social systems, you won’t believe your eyes. Sometimes I truly regret searching simply because ignorance is bliss. Trust me though, you won’t have to search very long before reality starts to unravel.

Don’t be a boiling frog that slowly dies as the temperature is turned up. Your mind is already invaded by 5 years old

So Superbowl Sunday is coming up which means I need to begin my search of something to do other than watch the game lol. I know it’s totally “unAmerican” of me, but I just don’t enjoy Superbowl Sunday. Commercials or game. What I do enjoy is having the city to myself for the most part lol. Everyone is crammed into hot sweaty living rooms pigging out while I can roam around and do whatever I want. I don’t know what snapped in my brain, but I think it was around 10 years ago now that I started not enjoying Superbowl Sunday. Maybe I’ll find someone to play catch with me by the beach or something. No football all day though. It’s weird the things you try (skipping football games, not watching TV anymore) and nobody, I mean NOBODY ever tells me I’ve been missing out. In fact almost everyone tells me I didn’t miss a thing lol. What’s funny and sad is all the years I mocked people that didn’t watch TV or go with the social flow on things…. ironic.

Well thanks to you the records by both the band and my folk record have been selling! Thanks for spreading the word, we rely entirely on it! If you need a refresher, check it out ;)

Also thanks for telling people to like the facebook page! Please Please PLEASE keep passing that around. We have to hit a certain number for something we’re working on, so any help would be awesome :)

ok bye

Chad Gerber

It’s Lame I know, But Please “Like” Us

January 27th, 2012 by cgerber

Ok this is a Facebook “like” plea. Not because we’re insecure little band boys who need “likes” to feel like our band is awesome, but for political reasons. Most informed companies and people we do biz with understand that the online world makes up a small percentage of fans. However, some not so informed people only care about online fans, which makes it hard to do business with them… seeing as how they’re completely uneducated in the marketing department. This is where we seriously need your help. I know how many people read this thing and it’s pretty nuts if you ask me. My own thoughts terrify me, then when I think about you reading them it terrifies me even more! Anyway, a lot of you read this, so a lot of you could “like” the band page and tell your friends to “like” it, and our little online problem would be solved. It’s easy, all you have to do is click this:

Now if you want a friend to jump in on the action, tell them to go here: www.facebook.com/thesuicidedenial and “like” the page! This will be soooooo much fun lol.

So from the top, click and you’re set! Or copy and past the link above to a friend… or do both! Seriously though, it’s lame I know, but we could really use your help on this. Please :)

Funniest part is that one day Facebook will fall and this will all seem pointless just like our 10,000 + fans on Myspace…

Been really mentally drifty lately for the record. More of that “being a musician is pointless” stuff going on. I want to fight evil and save countries, but instead I have a guitar strapped around my neck. I know it does a lot for people and all that, but sometimes it just doesn’t feel like it. I don’t REALLY know what it means to people, and that’s fine. I mean… how weird would that be if people were always gushing over our music and telling us how it made them feel lol. Our fans aren’t even like that really. Our fans are tough, outcasts, and can usually hold their own. I don’t know, just wishing I could do more in the world or something. I feel like Luke Skywalker…. but I’m not really stuck on a water farm… and I’m already doing what I’ve always dreamed of doing…. I guess it’s like I’m a Jedi and there’s nobody left to fight? All I do is twirl my light saber around for kids and move things with my mind for magic shows. What am I even talking about now? I just need to get on the road for a bit. Out among you. Doing shows together… all that stuff that makes music make sense. I also might be needing to learn just how to relax which is a possibility. I’m a doer and like to go go go, but sometimes I have to chill whether I like it or not… sucks. I have 55 music projects and bands yet it’s still not enough. Yeah… maybe this “chill” thing is something to really think about… I just feel like time is running out. And no I don’t mean 2012 time, just… time.

Chad Gerber

The Law Of Money Mr. Martial

January 26th, 2012 by cgerber

Sort of got swamped yesterday and didn’t get to write a blog up. Seemed like my phone get going off and I had to make calls and stuff. Not a bad problem to have I guess, but by the time things cooled off I figured nobody would be checking to see if this blog was up then anyway.

Money. That concept just won’t die. People place their worth in it, determine everything by it, judge others by it, it’s a sickness. I know someone who’s going to school to be a doctor and plans on providing their services for free to the poor once they graduate. I know for a FACT that people look down on this person because she won’t be making a lot of money. People literally tell her “well that won’t last” or “you’ll change your mind” based entirely upon money. If a doctor makes very little money, we label them a bad doctor. Money determines everything to humans. Even in a terrible economy people still place their value in money like a Jr. High kid places their value in the new Air Jordans. Apparently we never grow up.

I’m not really sure why I started going off about money… that’s kind of odd. If you don’t know it, you should check out our song “Money” off our newest album. Sums it up pretty good I think. Nice little band slideshow included as well :)
Kind of weird (and 100% on time) but military was doing air drills around LA this week. I didn’t see any cause they were behind me, but they were doing hovering drills in military choppers around specific landmarks, arenas, and I guess landing at Dodger Stadium and stuff. A military guy told the news that they typically do drills in any kind of environment they’ll most likely be working in soon. Hence drills in deserts for Iraq wars, jungle wars in Vietnam, ect. All of this is happening like clockwork once again :) I’m batting 1,000 on this stuff. I think I should get a badge or something. Now I’m just waiting to see what is going to trip the “lock down”. Oh, and if you’re in a small city or town, don’t think this doesn’t apply to you lol. Everything comes to the cities first before it is refined and trickles into the smaller towns, so don’t feel left out just yet :)

I’m still semi hanging out till March and April get here. I’m excited to start scoring a TV show, and start doing some fly gigs with a musical project that bounces around the country. Those are the best. Fly in, set up, perform, tear down, fly home. In between that I’m balancing 3 other musical projects/bands, so if I’m lucky this year will be even busier than the last! In the meantime I’m hoping to get caught up on some Halo with a friend tonight. Once everything starts going crazy I don’t get to play video games for most the year. Unless it’s on my phone… but those screens are so tiny!

Ok bye
Chad Gerber

I’m Not Scared Of Russia Anymore

January 24th, 2012 by cgerber

I used to be terrified of Russia. I could never figure out why growing up, but now I know it is from the USA’s portrayal of it in media (at least in the past) as “the bad guys”. I mean, I think just about all 80s movies were about Russia coming to get us lol. Even Rocky fought Russia. Well, I’m not terrified anymore and now I want to check out Moscow and that Red Square I think it’s called? It helped I’ve met Russians over the years and they’re usually nice. Then again it could be a huge plot to warm me up to them so I’ll go visit and then they’ll capture me! What if they mistake me as the Saint!? Remember that Val Kilmer movie? One of the last ones he did before becoming a farmer or whatever he is now. Pretty good movie.

I’m sure we all know how terrible fast food is for us, but I stumbled across a “processed meat” article the other day and just had to share some points in it that I either blocked out, or simply forgot. First off, processed meat means they squish whatever animal it is they’re processing into paste. That means if you’re to eat a chicken, you’re eating virtually every piece of that chicken including it’s beak, eyes, and poo. Unless the USFDA has banned this or something… even so, food paste is gross. That actually doesn’t bother me that much because food is food right? The human body can eat just about anything and break it down if it’s apart of the natural system.. however, since they paste-i-fy this food, it mixes with the blood and comes out all pinkish and disgusting looking full of poo so they SOAK IT in ammonia, (Yes, THAT ammonia) and food coloring to make it look normal color again. Once the poo and disease has been killed off by the ammonia, the meat is re-colored, then shortly later lands on your plate at your buddies BBQ or a fast food restaurant. Mmmm! Why do us humans food humans poison? Money. Because someone figured it out that machining an animal into paste makes them more money in the long run. Every day I’m closer to becoming a farmer.

So I’m working on some scoring stuff coming up and honing in some melodies. You should have a gander and what’s being cooked up in the lab here in Los Angeles :) Nothing super amazing, just idea sketches really, and unmixed. Imagine fighting werewolves while you listen. WinterOmenDemo by chadgerber

2012 is in Sun Valley playing shows with Andrew Ryan this weekend, so I’m losing myself in scoring! Bands are fun, but I’ll most likely die a composer when this whole thing is all said and done :)

Chad Gerber

NAMM Convention Last Week

January 23rd, 2012 by cgerber

Well the 2012 NAMM convention was a lot of fun this past Friday in Anaheim. Got to see a lot of old friends, sponsors, meet new people, and all that other fun stuff. It’s insane how many people are at this thing! Check out some pics!

Analog synthy goodness!

Analog synthy goodness! Could you see me playing this?

Guitars for Girls

Guitars for Girls

Me with the fellas from Rivera Amps

Me with the fellas from Rivera Amps


Of course hanging out with the Rivera Amp guys was probably the highlight of the exhausting day as I walked around for hours on end, mostly lost. As you know I play Rivera Amps and have been since I was a kid. I love them, and they’re incredible work horses. Plus the dudes are cool :) So I chatted with them a bit, then me and 2012 met up with the D’Adario guys and thanked them for tour supplies and stuff. I even ran into some old friends, and new ones from Warped. In all it was good. Still, the place is so big and crowded, it gets tiring a bit quick. It’s like shuffling around for miles in a crowd. That part is weird.

That’s all I feel like typing today. My mind is else where.

Chad Gerber

Ghosts Throwing Books at Me Hackers Hack

January 20th, 2012 by cgerber

Well today is NAMM and I’m excited. Kind of tired, but excited. Last night was in San Diego with friends and got home late… then wanted to watch some Netflix lol. Totally worth it though.

So remember that whole piracy thing I was posting about yesterday? Yeah, looks like that creepy hacker group Anonymous began taking down multiple government websites and entertainment sites like BAM! Just down. Those guys are powerful. It’s crazy cause it reminds me of this futuristic movie called Johnny Mnemonic. Ring a bell?

The future is now!

The future is now!

Anyway, it’s a cheesy future movie with Keanu Reeves that is about government and corporations taking over the planet and all that stuff that is really happening. What’s weird is there’s this group of people in it that are called………. I don’t remember what they’re called, but they basically continually hack the media giving people messages via a wired dolphin tell everyone to wake up. It’s a bit out there, but it’s interesting to see how this hacker group mirrors this scifi movie. Life imitating art? Indeed. Be careful of that one, we’ve talked about that one before haven’t we ;)

I had a random thought last night while peeing after drinking an energy drink (total poison by the way): Energy drinks go in the same color they come out.. why? I wasn’t really that interested in the “why” as much as I was just weirded out by it.

Oh yeah! Possibly had a paranormal experience last night in the Hotel Del Coronodo on the beach in San Diego! Well not ON the beach, the hotel is on the beach… whatever. If you don’t know the place, it’s incredibly old and one of the most famous hotels in America. I was sitting in a little lounge nook area with old books on shelves going up to the ceiling playing on my phone while my buddy sat across from me playing on his phone. We were there a few minutes in silence when we hear this loud noise! I went into protective mode in case something was going to fall on me. Long story short a book had just popped off the shelf (which is built into the wall) and tumbled down the wall and landed next to me on the couch. Oh yeah, the reason I said it may have been paranormal is because this hotel is supposed to be SUPER haunted. It’s always on haunted specials and all that. Regardless it was pretty weird. And yes I went through the possibilities of things that could have caused the book to magically leap off the wall book case, but I ran it by my group of friends, including the friend with me, and nothing made sense. So bottom line… weird.

About to head to NAMM. Be check Twitter and Facebook for pics today.

Chad Gerber

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